Friday, September 5, 2014

That's my story and I'm sticking to it

Most people may or may not know much about my walk with Christ.  I feel the need to explain why many have been hurt or confused about the way I have gone about that.  Here is my story :
I grew up in church hearing about God but not knowing Him (very possible).  Then,  I spent my teen years totally disregarding him as I went on to my adult years, where I did everything in my power to deny Him completely.
In my 23rd year,  He miraculously came and rescued me.  It was just Him and me on that balcony.  We started on a personal level and we have travelled that route ever since.  No man shared the glory of leading me to Him,  and no man will get the chance to lead me away.
 That's why hearts have been hurt because some take my commitment to Him first and foremost, personally.  But I hope to reveal my heart and maybe bring some healing and inspiration to those who don't quite understand.
He took me on a journey to find Him alone since that time. I began to read the Word for the first time,  to actually study it because I wanted my walk to be authentic.  I wanted to please this amazing God that was my Hero!  It wasn't a duty,  but a searching.  I returned to my roots and tried to revisit the route I walked as a child.  I sat there for several months and discovered the love of hearing a message that educated me and made me feel at home.  Sitting on the pew next to family,  as I should have as a child,  I got to rectify all the years of boredom and complacency I had wasted there.  I was so hungry.
But there was a calling inside for more than I experienced there.  It was never me trying  to disrespect what was there,  but it was a searching HE placed in me that said Keep Going,  there's more!
So,  I ventured on along with my husband to visit his roots for a while.  I walked into the doors and watched people worship God with full abandon and I was mesmerized!  The people there danced with joy,  clapped with excitement,  and prayed like they were shaking Heaven and earth with their petitions!  Hands raised in the air towards the Father,  Noone was embarrassed to treat God... Well,  like God!  My insides danced with excitement because I knew that once I got over my hesitations and my reservations to let go,  I would join in passionate worship,  as He deserved.
My love for His word grew and grew.  I studied and wanted to know beyond the surface.  Why and where and when.  I wanted proof and to then to share the proof with the world!  I brought notebooks and pen and scribbled furiously as the message went on.  It filled the intense hunger inside to know Him more in so many ways.  It was like a starving woman being given bread.
I began to read the book of Acts,  where the Holy Spirit was poured out and miracles manifested among the people of God,  after Jesus returned to Heaven with His promise that we would do greater works.  I wanted that "more" He sent me looking for.  See,  as a child,  one of many observations was that if the Bible was true,  why don't we experience what they experienced? The answer could not be satisfied with an easy,  "just because." Instead,  God pushed me to reclaim what He shed His blood for,  to fill me with the Holy Spirit's power.  (My beliefs are that this is a separate experience than salvation.) After a time of diligently seeking Him,  I was baptized with the Holy Spirit.  Life was never the same!
So I sat on those pews and I learned.  Every lesson was life to me.  But, as they taught on certain subjects,  and as I studied at home,  my heart began to be unsettled.  There were things that were contrary to the Bible and did not match up with the heart of God.  I saw walls being erected between people and God unnecessarily. Rules and regulations that were apparently tradition were weighed as gospel truths and caused much hurt and confusion.  I asked questions in private,  hoping to be convinced through the Word.  Instead I was met with "it is just the way it's always been done"  instead of proof.  No bending,  no bowing,  no allegiance to God's perfect word over tradition.  The Lord let me feel the danger in this situation and we decided to follow Him instead.  Much to our disappointment,  we were looked down upon and ostracized.
 We moved away for a few years for business and once we came back,  we did not return to the old ways we travelled before.  We moved forward.
We tried several places and settled here and there for a season.  There was learning in every spot God placed us.  We learned what to take with us and what to leave behind.  Some may utilize the term "church hopper"  and use it in a negative connotation to judge their  brothers and sisters but I see visiting other believers for a time as growth.  You will Never grow if you stay planted in the same small pot.  If we are all apart of one church, one body,  how can we hop churches anyway!  I hate this term and believe it is a ploy of Satan into teaching us that we are separate instead of unified.
After a while,  we found a beautiful body of believers that we enjoyed having in our lives for a time.  We joined every Sunday for worship and we did life together.  It was a joyous time for our family for that period.   God always reminded me that this was a short season and would not last forever. And it ended abruptly for us as we sat on a pew and heard things that we could not support in good conscience as we sought to serve God.  You see,  God had placed in me that His heart at its core is unity in the body.  He taught me that we are called to Be the church of Christ,  a living breathing organism,  more than the four walls we visit on Sundays. That we should put more focus on seeking God daily rather than the two hours, one time a week on Sunday. Teaching contrary to this is unbiblical and my heart hurt as I knew I would have to make a decision to walk away from this teacher,  but hopefully not from my friends who were like family.  Unfortunately,  allegiance to an institution or leader outweighs relationship and honest to goodness truth of the Bible alot of times.  People get comfortable.  They don't want to rock the boat.  If only they realized Jesus isn't in the boat,  He walks on the rough waters and calls for those willing to take a chance...
For months and months we chose to worship at home alone and grow as close to that Voice and His leading,  feeling the preparations of a ministry.  Those moments in our very home were some of the most priceless and miraculous we have ever experienced.  God grew so real and actual to us.  He trained and grew us.  And people attacked us.  We were called rebellious,  dangerous,  demons, and seeking after our own good.  Those people had no clue the voices that were telling them this knew NOTHING of our hearts.  It burst with passion to empower God's people.  To build them up and grow leaders!  Not ever to grow a group of followers that would worship us or stay on spiritual milk.  And God told me over and over,  do not defend yourself.  That was the hardest.  It was an extremely hurtful time.  My heart broke in a hundred pieces as those I adored and admired turned away completely.  But,  my heart stayed directed at the one my soul loves, Jesus.  He warns us that we will have to make decisions that don't make sense to the natural viewpoint.  And it's going to hurt and you will be left alone by the world for His namesake.. But,  it's going to be worth it.
There is a river that flows deep inside me.  It flows and deepens and widens.  It takes me places I never would have ventured to on my own and it is wild.  But the refreshing I find in that River of God has been my nourishment. I have tasted the deeper things and once that happens,  nothing else can ever quench that thirst.  Unfortunately,  that has to be experienced before it is understood.
There is beauty in leaving the usual behind.  There is fulfillment in allowing God alone to be the anchor.
So,  I want people to know: we are all called to walk that narrow path.  I know what it's like to give things up to follow truth.  I am not one who would ask you to do something I would not. I know what it's like to sacrifice every comfort for God.  This is just the tip of the iceberg.  He wants everything.  Would you be willing to leave a religion you served your whole life to chase Him?  Would you be willing to follow Him to the valleys?  Would you be willing to leave loved ones behind and embrace being misunderstood  for Him?
Because that's what it takes.  It's a part of the great commission: GO.  He is the mark,  He is the prize.  And He is so worth it! So that's my story,  and I'm sticking to it... Hope it encourages you to be Brave for Christ and walk out on the waters... There's no greater way!

"All flesh is like grass,  and all its glory like a flower of the grass.
The grass withers,  and the flower drops off,  but the word of the Lord endures forever." 1 Peter 1:24-25

Wednesday, June 26, 2013

The Fall from Heaven- Keeping Lily excerpt

  Today is a good day! All praises to God!
  I am choosing to share a chapter from the book today because I am moving forward, God willing, in the publishing process! I hope to share this with you and get some feedback. This chapter moves me so much. I become overwhelmed with emotion every time I reread it. A little set up for this chapter:
  The beginnings of time. The main character, a nameless guardian angel known as a Keeper, has discovered her closest friend, Jericho, has chosen to take Lucifer's side in the Great Deception- where a third of the angels get thrown out of Heaven. The Keeper decides to take this information to the Throne and reveal it all to God. Before she is able, something major takes place. Please enjoy.....


As Imade my way back down the path I'd followed up the Great Hill, mysteps were slow and calculated. No time was left to be wasted beforeI delivered a message that would surely be the catalyst to a chain ofevents that would change the future forever. I knew this meant theend of my friendship with Jericho. I didn't know what my words wouldmean for him, what would be his outcome. But, I knew my silence wouldbe a transgression against truth. My allegiance to the Only One waswithout question, and no matter the cost. I was going to approach TheThrone with information that He deserved to know, although itcouldn't possibly have escaped His attention this long. I couldn'tfigure out why He had allowed things to escalate this far. All I knewwas that I was going to let the Father know where I stood. I wastaking no chances on getting caught on the wrong side of thisatrocity.

Mymind wandered as I walked. Everything inside of me was tangled inknots; all conversations I'd had with Jericho, the faces of the onesunder the trees, the stares of the leader when he'd heard myintentions to shed light on his business. I moved slowly so that Icould gather my thoughts, although my mind spun out of control like atornado. The ideas and questions I still had about the wholesituation seemed to confuse me to the point that I had no idea how Iwould even begin to explain this travesty when I arrived at mydestination.. My heart was absolutely broken that my best friend wasamong the ones who would surely suffer because of my next decisions.I wondered what kind of judgment faced them all. I wondered if Iwould ever see my friend again.

Irecall walking through our Home, coasting past numerous others likeme, and I wondered if they could sense something was terribly wrongjust by my passing . I wouldn't meet their glances, but I could feelthe peace they exuded bouncing from their presence like a springtimebreeze. Oh, the joy of being oblivious! I did my best to hold closeto me my thoughts and fears. I knew the information I housed wasweightier than any matter flowing through the city, and I knew myeyes would tell the story if given the chance. So, forward I marched,eyes pierced straight down to the golden street. My vision dartedfrom one perfect flower to the next. My thoughts pounding like a druminside my head, I barely could muster the strength to lift my feetoff the ground. The closer I became to my destination, the more myfeet seemed to want to carry me in reverse. I had never known fear.My whole existence since creation was one of complete and uttertranquility. Now, here I was: looking back over my shoulder,expecting one -or all of them- to overtake me and do what? The more Ibegan to imagine them coming for me, although I didn't quite knowwhat they could possibly do to me, the faster and more relieved Ibecame to tell the story. I knew who my Protector was and I knewwhere to find Him. At that moment, I decided to rush.

As mygait began to excel, I was almost stopped in my tracks at Jericho'sthoughts inside my own.

Areyou sure you want to do this?” He knew where I was headed. At thispoint, I tried in no way to conceal my mission from him. I opened mythoughts wide and let him see my intentions to reveal this treacheryto the One. Perhaps this would shake him awake from this terriblenightmare he was living. I hoped he would retreat in time.

Pleasehear me out. Do you really think I would do anything to put my friendor myself in danger?'

A fewmoments passed before I decided to respond.

DoI know you at all?!” I replied.

Whywould you say such a thing? Listen to me, I am only looking out foryou. There is something coming and you need to be prepared. You needto know where you stand, and you are going to need protection innumbers. Our leader wants to offer you a position of power. ”

I waslivid! “I know exactly whereI stand, Jericho...and I'm sorry to say that it is nowhere near youor that band of fools who dare to blaspheme Father! Stay far awayfrom me!,” I choked out in exasperation.

Myheart was aching with pain I had never imagined. This new reality, offear and confusion and deceit, was so overwhelming that I almostcouldn't stand it. I wanted to be nowhere but in my Master's arms. MyFather offered love and protection unmatched anywhere in this worldor any other. Regardless of any love I'd ever felt for Jericho, Iknew where I belonged. I was suddenly sure of that.

Atthat moment, I felt a wave of rushing doom swallow up my innerthoughts and I knew the current flowed from Jericho.

Wait,what's happening? How did you...,” were the last words I heard himsay before everything went dark.

Jericho'swords were cut off and I stopped suddenly, stunned and confused in aflash at the utter blackness that fell all around us. You mustunderstand, the Light had been removed from our Home for the veryfirst time since eternity began. Never had we experienced this. Gaspswere all around as we tried to figureout what could possibly be happening.Terror began to shower itself over us like rain, joined with utmostsorrow and hopelessness:the feeling of the absence of Him. The ground began to rumble andquiver. A furious wind began to blow. It blew so viciously, I andeveryone around me, were crushed to the ground. The Power of theSpirit was surging over us like the force of a freight train would feel to gnat on the rails. We struggled to lay prostrate to keepfrom blowing violently all around. Suddenly the brilliance shownforth like it had never been gone. I squeezed my eyes to see what wasat the foot of the Throne. I blinked wildly until the smoke from TheMaster's nostrils cleared the vicinity.

At the foot of the throne, many were joined together,yet they were not rising. I thought for a moment they were in deepprayer and reverence, until I saw the face of God Almighty bend downand meet them face to face. His countenance is usually so far abovethat we rarely see the Creator come down for such a close encounter.His face was so beautiful that a thousand stars couldn't hold acandle to the sparkling brilliance it beheld. All of Heaven gasped atthe sight. His eyes were blazing flames and His voice buckled theground, thundering judgments to the tiny creations at His beautifulfeet.

Oh my, is this what I think it is?! My eyes focused inon the giant multitude on the ground. There was one struggling in thefront to stand, but the power was too much for this stubbornblasphemer. I recognized the long limbs quivering as they fought todefy the breath of God storming on top of him. Directly behind him, aform I knew very well was held by the force onto the ground with hiseyes squeezed shut...Jericho, prostrate with a face that looked likeit would melt from the anguish displayed there. My eyes had not seenthe likes of that level of horror before nor since that horrendousday.

The archangels flew in circles around God and over thecrowd. They had swords larger than their bodies drawn and pointed tothe dreadful ones below. They had heavy chains in their hands, and Iwatched as they locked them up one by one, all the while, shouting ina harmonious chorus, “Holy Holy, Holy is the Lamb!” No one daredto fight back. No one dared to lift their eyes to God. Fear wastangible and it blanketed our world.

As quickly as it all began, the Lord spoke His royaldecrees concerning the Fallen and their atrocities. I am not atliberty to disclose to you the details. Some things must stay amystery, yet all will be laid bare on that great and awesome day ofthe Judgment. But I can tell you that what happened next will foreverhaunt me and everyone who witnessed it. The Lord, God, Almighty tookHis powerful hand and He swept them up into it. They looked like antson a stick, scrambling to hold on as He waved it through the air. Inoticed that it must have been a third of everyone I knew graspingonto His palm and fingers. He closed His tremendous fist and raisedit high above His crown. Their wailing could be heard so loudlyoutside and inside my senses that it was unbearable. Everyonewatching was paralyzed with fear of what would happen next. We wereso closely entangled spiritually that we felt every ounce of horrorpounding through them in those moments. Suddenly, the darkness fellagain, and the next thing I knew, a bolt of lightening, a loud bangfrom far below us. They were gone...and Heaven wept.
 
 


Monday, June 24, 2013

Hi, guys! I've decided to share another little nibble of "The Book" today. :)
Keeping Lily, if you don't already know, is a story...or more so, a journey, alongside a guardian angel. The perspective you see is one of the spirit realm- an inside look into God's "Keepers" and the Beings they protect throughout their lifetimes on earth.
I'm including the introduction again, along with the first little chapter. They aren't long, but the emotion is thought-provoking and enticing enough to visit each scenario or memory and leave you feeling full. I think so anyway. :)
Well, it's not my story to tell. Honestly, I can't believe the words flowed out the way they did. I truly believe this was Spirit inspired. So, I hope it speaks to you and Enjoy!



Keeping Lily
  27,385: The number of days in an average human lifespan. It really doesn't seem like all that many, especially to someone such as myself. I've been around to see my fair share...of lifetimes, that is.

  I am a Keeper. Created to worship, forced to defend. I existed before the stars of the heavens and I will outlive each of them. My journey is an eternal one. My purpose is the same. Rarely do we choose to share ourselves so freely with you this side of the veil, but this story is a special one. It is one that carries truth and revelation. I have been allowed to shine this light, so to speak, and expose the common enemy we share for your own good. A battle is coming, and you must be aware of the forces you unknowingly face and are expected to fight, with weapons not of carnal origins. . Take heed my words and listen intently. Your very existence depends upon it. There isn't much time to waste. There are rumblings and shakings occurring, and the time approaches quickly. I don't know if you've noticed. I will reveal what I feel I must. My name isn't as important as what I do. So I shall leave it at that.. All glory Above.  Now, where was I? Oh, yes...
  Life. I watch as it's born, walk along the milestones beside it, all the while fighting the good fight. I watch them struggle. I watch them rejoice. I watch them fail. I watch them learn and grow. I watch them fade and transfer. I watch as they take their first steps into the restitution of all their days in an eternity unimaginable. Which eternity and what type of unimaginable ranges from glorious perfection to something completely and utterly opposite. I think you understand. There is so much that can happen between point A and B. The factors are numerous, and the twists and turns, sharp. The battle, fierce. The reward, everything. The fact that the ultimate conclusion rests heavily in my very hands is, what you might call, a maddening responsibility.  
  As the ages wind down and the Day approaches, this chapter in time is when the Father has chosen my story to be delivered. His timing is purposeful, even though you nor I comprehend every perfect detail that has been orchestrated by doing so. I shall reveal secrets, expose lies, and glorify the Glorious to the best of my capabilities. You will walk along next to me, as we travel not only distance, but time and through realms your conscious has yet to fathom. I was given this present assignment as a Keeper with the understanding that she would be my last. It was a request I made personally, and was graciously granted, in regards to the loss I’d encountered before...
The pressure of success looms overhead, blinking like a neon sign, a constant reminder that every breath is one (two...three...) closer to her final. Every inhalation filling her chest is like the sail of a ship traveling along a fantastic journey. Every exhale, like the winds, pushing her closer to that final destination. The finish line rushes towards us at an alarming pace. Even I don't know the final hour or day. That's part of the complexity of the challenge.
  So, it's a blink of an eye, and there you are. Round and round it goes...where and when it stops is anyone's guess.
Better make the most of it, kid.

































Friday, May 10, 2013

Filet Mignon, anyone?

God will always match your level of hunger for Him.
Did He ever deny the hungry?
As the multitudes of hungry people grew, so did the miraculous to feed them.
So is the spiritual.
"The effectual FERVENT prayers of a RIGHTEOUS man achieves MUCH." Right?
So if you aren't hungry for more at all, that's what you will receive: nothing more.
But, think about how it feels to not be fed? You grow weak. It physically hurts. There is an overwhelming feeling that something is
missing and you must be filled. If you feel dried up, sick spiritually, stagnant... There's a reason. All it takes is for you to catch His eye with your hunger, and He's always watching. Always waiting. He delights in us... Imagine how He feels when we actually delight in Him...I know how much I delight in a big filet mignon, or some Hibachi and sushi. If I have all the tools to go get that meal, you better believe I am there! Ha! You have been offered some very awesome tools to go after God that way. He already paid the price... And you can make no mistake- if somebody was picking up my bill, I would be there with bells on!
But think about this:
For the hurting and the hungry, He never went begging and searching for them. He waited for those desperate enough to come looking as He passed through.
Remember, they had five little fish and two loaves of bread, but ALOT of hungry people and what did He do? Multiplied it to meet their hunger level.
If you say you're hungry, yet don't go after Him, He will not bother to come force feed you.
When I'm hungry, in the natural sense, my mind always conjures up a multitude of foods and sweets and edibles to be enjoyed. That's how we should be with God... So hungry that we just get lost in thought over the spiritual things. So hungry for more revelation.
You know, it is truly amazing how when you are on a certain level with God, you cannot see what the next level could hold. Your mind can't imagine. But, once you begin to GET HUNGRY, He puts desires for things you didn't realize inside you. Once those desires are planted inside your heart- by Him- He waits for you to pursue, intent to feed you at the right time.
Does anyone reap from their garden without work?
Does anyone eat at their dinner table without putting forth the effort to cook?
So it is with God. I'm not talking about EARNING anything. {{It's already yours.}} The key is saying, "God , you have something I want. That something is more of you. There is nothing I want unless it reveals more of who You are and feeds my soul more of your Spirit."
Then, starts a beautiful quest to seeking Him. Setting your sights on things above and going after them.
Prayer, worship, praise, obedience to His whispers and Word, decreasing so He will increase...and for me, going wherever the Spirit blows. Honestly, if I hear there's a fire... Anyone who knows me knows I'm headed straight into it. There is nothing wrong with visiting around and sampling what God is doing in his people. We are all one body- brothers and sisters, right? I have gained PRICELESS revelation and growth being touched by many different walks and lives. Hearing different testimonies, watching different forms of worship, new types of music, and getting introduced to beautiful lives that hunger...If you stay in a box- and God is NOT in box, my dears- you will never grow. Yuck... Stale bread doesn't taste very good and it begins to get rigid and moldy, eww. God forbid we get to that place!
Growth in our bodies requires food. As we grow older, our tastes mature. Are you still eating the same things you were years ago? If so, DO SOMETHING different! For goodness sake, God's Spirit ebbs and flows and it is Not and never will be contained in one set of walls. Now, hold onto your britches!! I'm not telling you jump ship and ditch your church, I'm saying get out and mingle in the body. There is such richness to be found in others' walks. Hear of someone who God has done amazing things in? Ask them about their prayer life and I guarantee it all started with a hunger for more...
Don't know where to start?
Talking to Him more. That simple. And Asking.
Be honest and say, "I don't even know what it means to have more of you. But, if you got it, I want it."
Prayers like that have changed my life.
Do you know He is more eager to give of Himself than we are to ask!?
He has GOOD GIFTS for His kids ;)
So, never forget to follow that Spirit that blows WHERE IT WISHES... And you will find exactly what you didn't even know to wish for!
Amazing depths and heights... A communication with the Creator that you could never imagine!
A walk with God that is truly authentic and real. Once you've had a taste of it, you can't quit. Just like sushi!! Haha! Just don't forget to give it away... Share what you receive with others and help get them fed! Don't be greedy!
So, today I pray your hunger grows and you do whatever it takes to "taste and see that the Lord is Good!"
Blessings!!

Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Keeping Lily Sneak Peek #2

Hi, guys! I've decided to share another little nibble of "The Book" today. :)
Keeping Lily, if you don't already know, is a story...more so, a journey alongside a guardian angel. The perspective you see is one of the spirit realm- an inside look into God's "Keepers" and the Beings they protect throughout their lifetimes on earth.
I'm including the introduction again, along with the first little chapter. They aren't long, but the emotion is thought-provoking and enticing enough to visit each scenario or memory and leave you feeling full. I think so anyway. :)
Well, it's not my story to tell. Honestly, I can't believe the words flowed out the way they did. I truly believe this was Spirit inspired. So, I hope it speaks to you and Enjoy!




 Keeping Lily
27,385: The number of days in an average human lifespan. It really doesn't seem like all that many, especially to someone such as myself. I've been around to see my fair share...of lifetimes, that is.

  I am a Keeper. Created to worship, forced to defend. I existed before the stars of the heavens and I will outlive each of them. My journey is an eternal one. My purpose is the same. Rarely do we choose to share ourselves so freely with you this side of the veil, but this story is a special one. It is one that carries truth and revelation. I have been allowed to shine this light, so to speak, and expose the common enemy we share for your own good. A battle is coming, and you must be aware of the forces you unknowingly face and are expected to fight, with weapons not of carnal origins. . Take heed my words and listen intently. Your very existence depends upon it. There isn't much time to waste. There are rumblings and shakings occurring, and the time approaches quickly. I don't know if you've noticed. I will reveal what I feel I must. My name isn't as important as what I do. So I shall leave it at that.. All glory Above.  Now, where was I? Oh, yes...
  Life. I watch as it's born, walk along the milestones beside it, all the while fighting the good fight. I watch them struggle. I watch them rejoice. I watch them fail. I watch them learn and grow. I watch them fade and transfer. I watch as they take their first steps into the restitution of all their days in an eternity unimaginable. Which eternity and what type of unimaginable ranges from glorious perfection to something completely and utterly opposite. I think you understand. There is so much that can happen between point A and B. The factors are numerous, and the twists and turns, sharp. The battle, fierce. The reward, everything. The fact that the ultimate conclusion rests heavily in my very hands is, what you might call, a maddening responsibility.  
  As the ages wind down and the Day approaches, this chapter in time is when the Father has chosen my story to be delivered. His timing is purposeful, even though you nor I comprehend every perfect detail that has been orchestrated by doing so. I shall reveal secrets, expose lies, and glorify the Glorious to the best of my capabilities. You will walk along next to me, as we travel not only distance, but time and through realms your conscious has yet to fathom. I was given this present assignment as a Keeper with the understanding that she would be my last. It was a request I made personally, and was graciously granted, in regards to the loss I’d encountered before...
The pressure of success looms overhead, blinking like a neon sign, a constant reminder that every breath is one (two...three...) closer to her final. Every inhalation filling her chest is like the sail of a ship traveling along a fantastic journey. Every exhale, like the winds, pushing her closer to that final destination. The finish line rushes towards us at an alarming pace. Even I don't know the final hour or day. That's part of the complexity of the challenge.
  So, it's a blink of an eye, and there you are. Round and round it goes...where and when it stops is anyone's guess. Better make the most of it, kid.

The Last Assignment
  I remember watching her descent from Above, and remarking at how brilliantly her light shone. As she was released from heaven's grasp, those surrounding me- waiting anxiously to follow their own through the keyhole of realities and down to earth- gasped at the beauty of her spirit. I had never witnessed another quite like it in all my time as a Keeper, and I supposed it must be rare for all the others to notice as well. This one would be special. I'd only heard of those that were chosen and the special way they glimmered with the Master's touch upon them. “Anointing” is the word best used to describe this special gleam cast upon it for a certain purpose in time. All were beautiful in their own ways, of course. But, this was magnificent as it shone with the sparkling glory that was washing all over it as it coursed down from His throne.  I felt myself beaming with anticipation. It had been generations since I'd felt that feeling. Perhaps this appointment, my last, remind you, would be my easiest. At least, that was my hope.
  I shudder to tell you that all do not make it safely back. Ultimately, the choice is theirs' to make, and even the mightiest Keeper can't control the will of a Being. Tossed amongst worldly delusions and let's not forget the consistent romancing of the Enemy every step of the way, it is a wonder any make it back Home at all. From the instant human eyes are opened to behold this world anew, until the very last moment they close for all eternity, the Darkness is present...on constant vigil alongside me and those like me. It is with them that the battle rages with furious fervency. They, fighting with hatred for all things created with a chance to gain entrance into a Presence they will never see again. We, fighting with the purest love of a Father, whose children are scattered and in desperate need of rescue from the grasp of the mouths of lions.
  The loss of a soul cuts to the core of a Keeper’s existence, and truthfully, time does not heal all wounds. Even the unwound-able feel this sort of pain. Feel it, perhaps, deeper and more physically than any human ever felt an emotion. The breaking of a heart, the loss of a loved one to disease or tragedy or war: emotions that reach to the very core. These manifestations of human despair do not even begin to match how this ultimate and final loss affects the heavenly host. Knowing we lost one of His...it is an eternal loss that fleshly minds cannot ascertain. 
  A piece of me goes with them, a part of myself lost forever in the abyss...like a lone grain of sand dropped to the bottom of the deep, dark blue. 
   This one would be different I told myself. She had to be: look at her light. The Spirit was all around her. Maybe that's why we were chosen for each other- an easy victory chosen to mend my very broken soul. Just the thought of it rekindled a song inside of me.
  But, things are never quite that easy outside of the Kingdom. The warring begins just outside of the gates. Darkness and shadow loom at every step, a battlefield of invisible authorities fighting over the rights to every precious soul.
  So, my battle begins. This will be my last and final chance to direct a soul into that safe harbor...a place where the spirit finds its home and the Light shines forever.







Sunday, April 21, 2013

My Heart

What would happen if the church danced for God for hours like we did when we went to the bars?
What if we were as willing to make a fool of ourselves for God as we did drunk on that dance floor?
What if we spent the time praying and reading about Him instead of glued to a television or computer or smartphone for that length of time each day?
What if we celebrated Him as much as we do our favorite bands or teams instead of being embarrassed to worship openly?
What if we took our concerns to Him instead of posting about them on Facebook?
What if we showed up to church expecting to spend as much time as He wanted in His presence until He fell on every person in the room instead of checking our watches?
Does the church today even know what that means?
What if we came with our intentions to pour our love out on HIM instead of seeing what He was going to feed us on Sunday?
What if the world began to see our churches as places of the miraculous instead of a glorified social club?
What if we began to fast and pray for TRUE revival like we have never experienced instead of always giving Him Our list of needs?
What if His needs were our needs?
What if the lame began to walk and cancer was cast out in an instant?
What if souls were saved with no chance of backsliding because His Spirit was given the freedom to do HIS work during our services?
What if the alters were flooded with tears and repentance?
What if people were raised up with boldness to preach the gospel instead of being collected on the pews?
What if we walked like Jesus?
What if we did greater works like He promised?
What if we began to question the condition of the church?
What if the Spiritual gifts were working in abundance instead of looked over because we are accustomed to walking without them?
What if we decided things weren't going to change unless someone does something differently?
What if we humbled ourselves and took part of the blame?
What if we took God at His word and dared to believe?
What if we decided to take our inheritance back by force?
What if a few decided they weren't going to rest until this all came to pass?
What if God was given His church back?
So many What Ifs, so many excuses, so many opportunities, so little time..
Be the change. God's looking for that few to make a stand. I'm ready, are you?

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Letting go

One of the most difficult things to do in this life is Let Go. I can hardly think of a situation where letting go feels good. Letting go of a life, career, and dreams I thought were meant to be was the most difficult thing I have ever been through. Letting go of control and trying to change things I thought I could change. Letting go of people when it hurt but was inevitable. Letting go of old thought processes and beliefs. Letting go of what people thought about me. Letting go of what I think about others. Letting go of who I thought I was, even. Letting go when someone hurt me. That always stings, but letting go is the first step in healing and freedom. Letting go of trying to impress, and learning to love what God has for me whatever that is. Letting go, there are so many numerous situations. Letting go, it even sounds sad. But, I've come to
learn that letting go means growth. When I can't "let go" it means I'm holding onto something. If I hold onto one thing, I cannot have my hands free to grab ahold of what's new. I cannot receive what God has for me if my hands are full of the things which I cannot let go of. But, usually, when I can't let go of something, the truth of the matter is, I don't have it at all. It usually has me. Anything I cannot release, I am bound by. Thus, I become a slave to. Who is the master today in your life? What are the things God wants you to let go of, in TRUST, so He can renew your life His way?
Letting go means I give my circumstances to God. Letting go is beautiful. The first time a person decides to let go of themselves and give it to God, is usually difficult until one sees what beauty is waiting on the other side of that decision. Letting go is putting total trust and hope in the Only One who is worthy of it. So my prayer for you and myself today is that we just LET GO... And let God.
Plain and simple.
Many blessings and love to you today!